" The culminating glory of the dinner was the address of Mrs. "the Unkies." She hadn't merely given them dominoes; indeed her first notion had been far more imaginative.Adelaide Tarr Gimmitch, known throughout the country as "the Unkies' Girl," because during the Great War she had advocated calling our boys in the A. She wanted to send to every soldier at the Front a canary in a cage.Come on, now, tell your real middle name, Mong General! Gimmitch, "since you folks are bound and determined to drag the secrets out of a poor soldier, I better confess that while I do abhor war, yet there are worse things. A state of so-called peace, in which labor organizations are riddled, as by plague germs, with insane notions out of anarchistic Red Russia!
She had also (since the vote had been forced on her) been a Republican Committee-woman in 1932, and sent to President Hoover daily a lengthy telegram of advice. It is composed of females who spend one half their waking hours boasting of being descended from the seditious American colonists of 1776, and the other and more ardent half in attacking all contemporaries who believe in precisely the principles for which those ancestors struggled. But on a public platform her voice became brassy, her eyes filled with embarrassing fury. She was constantly poking into things that were none of her business, and at town meetings she criticized every substantial interest in the whole county: the electric company's rates, the salaries of the schoolteachers, the Ministerial Association's high-minded censorship of books for the public library.
And, though herself unfortunately childless, she was esteemed as a lecturer and writer about Child Culture, and she was the author of a volume of nursery lyrics, including the immortal couplet: But always, 1917 or 1936, she was a raging member of the Daughters of the American Revolution. Now, at this moment when everything should have been all Service and Sunshine, Mrs. " Then the good old war horse, Gimmitch, veteran of a hundred campaigns against subversive Reds, trained to ridicule out of existence the cant of Socialist hecklers and turn the laugh against them, swung into gallant action: "My dear good woman, if a gal, as you call it, has any real charm and womanliness, she won't have to 'hook' a man—she'll find 'em lined up ten deep on her doorstep! She tore into it: "I tell you, my friends, the trouble with this whole country is that so many are selfish! Thinking only of how much wages they can extort out of their unfortunate employer, with all the responsibilities he has to bear! Peace is a great dream, but maybe sometimes it's only a pipe dream!
The Annual Ladies' Dinner was a most respectable gathering—the flower of Fort Beulah.
Most of the ladies and more than half of the gentlemen wore evening clothes, and it was rumored that before the feast the inner circle had had cocktails, privily served in Room 289 of the hotel.
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